Thursday, December 27, 2012

2012 MUSIC: THE YEAR IN REVIEW


It’s that time of the year again, another list by yours truly. This year saw the return of Pop music and not that Katy Perry/Rihanna music, but that genuine 90s/early 00s pop music as well as some much needed story-telling missing in rap recently. I present to you my year end list of singles and albums and in-betweens:-


MY TOP TEN SONGS OF 2012:

1.     Call Me Maybe- Carly Rae Jespen

2.     Payphone f./ Wiz Khalifa- Maroon 5

3.     Turn Up The Music- Chris Brown

4.     Some Nights- Fun.

5.     Adorn- Miguel

6.     Gangnam Style- Psy

7.     Mercy f./ Big Sean, Pusha T & 2 Chainz- Kanye West

8.     Like To Party- Burna Boy

9.     Senrere ft. Taymib- Ajebutter 22

10.  Somebody That I Used To Know ft. Kimbra- Gotye

If you have a problem with my number one pick, call me… maybe! Or just tell me I used to be somebody that you used to know, abi?!


Throwback record of the year: We’re In This Together by Nine Inch Nails.
If you saw The Avengers trailer: the song playing in the background. Released in 1999, this seven-minute opus still kicks ass today (a little retro, of course), fit for a movie of disgruntled superheroes who have to work together… I guess they’re in this together now (haha, dry humour). They should use Every Day Is Exactly The Same for The Avengers sequel, hehehe!


Best Use of A Sample: Memories Back Then- T.I ft. B.O.B & Kendrick Lamar.
This record samples Gotye’s Somebody That I Used To Know, yet surprisingly didn’t make T.I’s latest album Trouble Man. Probably didn’t clear the sample on time… or at all.


Best Guest Verses of the year:

1.)  Kendrick Lamar on A.S.A.P Rocky’s Fucking Problem ft. 2 Chainz, Drake & Kendrick Lamar./ Kendrick Lamar on T.I’s Memories Back Then ft. B.O.B & Kendrick Lamar.

2.)  Pharaoh Monche on !Mayday!’s Death March (Remix) ft. Pharaoh Monche & Stat Quo.

3.)  Method Man on Wu Block’s Pull Tha Cars Out ft. Ghostface Killah, Sheek Louch & Method Man.

4.)  2 Chainz on Kanye West’s Mercy ft. Big Sean, Pusha T & 2 Chainz (won him a BET award, which I predicted by the way)

5.)  Terry Tha Rapman on Tuface’s Bother You. This song was a so-so mid-tempo track, but the standout part about it was Terry’s verse. It’s the only part you’ll most likely remember when the song is over (no diss to Tu Baba, I dey hail o! I’m just saying.)

The How-Was-This-Not-A-Single record of the year: Pull The Cars Out-Wu Block. Meth killed his verse.


Finally breaking through pop record of the year: This Is Love ft. Eva Simmons- Will.I.Am.
For years Will.I.Am has searched for the perfect pop hit as a solo artist. As a member of The Black Eyed Peas, he’s had millions, but not so much on his own until he dropped this little gem featuring Dutch singer Eva Simmons. Finally!


Redemption record of the year: Breathing- Jason Derulo.
Last year Jason Derulo sampled Robin S’s Show Me Love and ruined it (in my highly regarded and respected opinion) for his single Don’t Wanna Go Home. We sure wanted him to go home when he dropped that, but this year he redeemed himself with the all original Breathing. I like and I forgive.


Most overlooked Pop record of the year: Masquerade- Nicki Minaj.
For someone who dropped more pop records than actual rap records this year, it’s amazing how this song got overlooked. Thanks to Adidas who used it for one of their commercials featuring her, Big Sean and Jojo Simmons (you’ve probably seen it on MTV), this song got some attention. The song is actually better than all those songs she made videos for except for maybe Beez In The Trap and I Am Your Leader.


Most overlooked Rap record of the year: Driving By- Wu Block feat. Ghostface Killah, Sheek Louch, Masta Killah, GZA & Erykah Badu
The sample is crazy and the beat is slow enough for when driving by.


Most underrated Naija songs of the year:

1.     Anamachi Kwanu- Ill Bliss ft. Phyno.

2.     Subsidy Blues (Unnoticed Occupy Anthem)- T.R.P, Bilzee & B.B.P.
Ok, I’m putting this here, ‘cause I’m on the first (and arguably the best) verse of the song. You know how I do. Download here..


ALBUMS/MIXTAPES AND EPS OF THE YEAR:

1.     GOOD KID, M.A.A.D CITY- Kendrick Lamar: Dre stopped working on my album to work on this. Can’t hate! Dear children, who listen to Nigerian rap albums, don’t be confused. This too is a rap album… it just has story-telling! You know, where people actually say something!

2.     LIFE IS GOOD- Nas: Also known as Resurgence of the year. Nas had the album of the year… then Kendrick showed up!

3.     KANYE WEST PRESENTS G.O.O.D MUSIC CRUEL SUMMER- Kanye West: The half-baked group album better than any group album out this year or the past few years for that matter. I’m looking at you MMG and YMCMB!

4.     A LOOSE QUARTER- Joe Budden: What can you say about a guy whose album sounds like a diary of his life? And you know his life is the shit! Ask twitter!

5.     BLUNDERBUSS- Jack White: Nominated for album of the year for the 2013 Grammys. I still can’t help, but wonder what this album would’ve sounded like if it had been done like it was initially supposed to. White was suppose to record with RZA of the Wu-Tang Clan, which would’ve been off the hinges, because White has never recorded digitally (that’s right Children, people still play instruments). Although RZA was supposed to play guitar alongside White, you know they would’ve done something digital, considering RZA is also known as Bobby Digital (little inside joke for Wu heads). Nonetheless Blunderbuss is still a great album, however in my opinion it’s not that great when stacked up to previous White projects, particularly with his O.G band The White Stripes or The Raconteurs, but we’ll settle for this. The Grammy committee has too!

6.     ON THE HOUSE- Slaughterhouse: Not to be confused with the album, Welcome To Our House. On The House was the prelude to the sophomore and Shady debut album of Slaughterhouse. Only problem… it sounded better than the album. This might be because it was recorded after the album and clearly some songs should’ve made the album, but I’m guessing sample clearance became an issue. How else do four album worthy songs end up on a mixtape?!

7.     EMPIRE MATES STATE OF MIND- E.M.E All Stars: This deluxe edition (there was no other edition by the way, who Banky wan do wayo for?) was not bad at all. I just had a problem with the way the singles were promoted, but we’ll get to that. Banky did something smart here, he overstuffed the album (22 songs) so the wack songs and album fillers were buried among the manageable to the great. That’s smart. Now back to the singles. Having listened to the album from track 1 to 245, I can tell you I would’ve promoted the singles in a very different order. They would’ve been in this order: 1. Reppin’ Emeazzyyy. 2. Change. 3. Can’t Stop Us. 4. Get Down Tonight. 5. Baddest Boy. 6. Sun Mo Mi. In this order, we would’ve been introduced to the lesser known members of E.M.E much quicker rather than watching a video where their names were posted with their faces. I’m a bit disappointed Banky didn’t have enough faith in the non-dance tracks to promote them, considering they were very good in my opinion. For a Naija album, I rate this 4/5 (I’m feeling very gracious here, you know me, I’m an everybody-hater). One more thing, Banky finally addresses his big head on Can’t Stop Us (“The head is as big as the one your kele gave me”) So Banky has a spine? Who would’ve thought?! (P.S. Is X.O Senavoe a part of the group and why does he sound the same on every record? I don’t mean his voice, mumu. I mean his rapping sounds the same on just about every track, IMO.)

8.     AWAY AND BEYOND- Tuface Idibia: I suppose this should get a mention being the best contemporary (read: non-dance) album I heard out of Naija.

Notable mention: Scorpio Season- Nelly. Miss the old Nelly? You know the one on the first two or three albums? Well take away a few songs on this mixtape and there he is, like he never left.

Excluded due to its December release:- Vicious Lies and Dangerous Rumors- Big Boi.
Due to being released in December, I won’t include this album in the chart, but Big Boi’s 2nd solo album (3rd, if you include Speakerboxxx is the most experimental album I’ve heard this year and if  I had to put it on the list, I’d put it in third place ahead of  Kanye’s Cruel Summer. It certainly will be album of the year so far as of January 2013, so find a copy and listen. Abdulnasir says so!


More Miscellaneous mentions:

Best New Artist: Burna Boy

Artist Of The Year: King Kendrick Lamar/ a.k.a Benz is to me just a car/ that means your friends have to be up to par/ ‘cause my standards are pampered by threesome tomorrow.

Controversy of the year: This year’s Headies Award.

I think the Headies committee needs to make up their mind on whether the fans should vote or the committee should vote, but splitting the voting between both groups doesn’t make sense (so if I go up against Ice Prince and win the people’s vote, the committee can just come and give it to Ice Prince? I go kill person). Either be like the AMAs and MTV awards and let people choose (with a few awards chosen by the committee like say Video of the Year, since they all look the same now) or be like the Grammys and let a select committee of industry insiders pick the winners and more importantly the nominees, because that was another complain this year. One other thing that irks me about the Headies is they shouldn’t have to ask people to submit their music to be considered for nomination. That’s just crass. It’s the Headies, not an upstart awards. By now they should have a group of music insiders who suggest people to be nominated and considered (not just in Lagos o, we Abuja people count) and not for the artist (or their management) to submit their music “for consideration”. That’s just plain stupid and like I said only upstart awards can get away with that.

This year’s complaints ranged from those who were nominated to those who won. As one person put it, “I didn’t have a problem with the winners. I had a problem with the nominees.” One other person wasn’t so nice, “I feel like they picked their winners; then built the categories and nominees around them.” These are actual quotes, I’m not dramatizing.

As far as the awards themselves are concerned, I don’t have much of a problem with the categories. I do wish however they will introduce a Mixtape of the Year award cause I think Eva would’ve won (based largely on impact) and because I plan to drop mine (fingers crossed) next year and I wouldn’t mind some sort of validation of my skills as I plan to win… unless that short black boy (a.k.a bonehead) M.I decides to drop Illegal Music 3, then the Headies committee is just going to give it to him.

And seriously how did SDC lose Best Rap Album of the year? That’s the one I really didn’t get, everything else I can live with. Although to be fair to the Headies (and those who voted Ice Prince) on this one, SDC had arguably one of the worst promotions for one of the best albums in a while.

I’m also not so sure about TY Mix as producer of the year for the simple fact that Naeto C’s “Ten Over Ten” sounds similar to Chidinma’s “Kedike” (which he both produced) and not in a producer-trademark kind of way. Where’s the range? Also I think Femi Ojetunde got overlooked as far as nominations are concerned, except if Tuface’s album didn’t fall into the specified time period, then I understand. But I also think he might be overlooked next year, because he doesn’t make the typical afro pop music of the day. Just saying.

I was also a bit confused trying to figure out the difference between Next Rated, Rookie of the year and Hip Hop World Revelation, because they kind of sounded like the same award with different names. Next Rated I got to know was for new artist w/out an album (Davido rightfully won in my opinion), while World Revelation is for new artist with an album (Wizkid, who should’ve won Album of the Year rightfully won this one too). And they need to stop calling it Hip Hop World Revelation, ain’t nothing Hip Hop about Wizkid. Since we’ve sorted that little bit out, there’s one more confusing bit: isn’t Next Rated and Rookie the same then? These people are confusing!

Peace, see you next year… or next week, I’ll drop my favourite movies of the year.

Friday, November 23, 2012

NEW MUSIC: SAEON- JARA

Every now and then a new artist emerges. Luckily I've actually met this one in particular, about two years ago when she was in Abuja. Her name is Saeon, unfortunately I never got to hear her sing or rap (as I was told she could do both.Can't everybody, these days?) but today I received an official record from her/her people. And yes it sounds quite different, yet it reminds me of the early '00s Britney Spears, before she went all cuckoo. That said, Saeon seems normal. Enjoy. Here's the official press release for Jara:-

"After featuring her video on B.E.T and World Star Hip Hop and much success with her first single "LIE" featuring FLOWSSICK, SAEON is thrilled to announce the release of her latest single  "JARA." The new single, "JARA" will be available everywhere on the 23rd of November, 2012.

"JARA" is an AfroPop track, which industry mates refer to as a breath of fresh air as SAEON comes off with a style new to the industry. The single was written & composed by SAEON and produced by TinTin.






SAEON is available for phone & radio interviews.
Please contact:
Email:
saeonmusic@gmail.com or icirculateworld@gmail.com.

Friday, November 2, 2012

2 CHAINZ REMIXES GANGNAM STYLE


*THIS IS A PARODY.

2 Chainz:    2 Chaiiiiiiiiiinz!
                  
                   My bitch be Korean (Yeah!)
                   My car be Korean (Yeah!)
                   You think it’s European
                   You ain’t seeing what I’m seeing
                   Hyundai, colour of Strawberry
                   A big booty girl, I’m gonna merry!
                   Me and Psy
                   We do it Gangnam style
                   With my bitch
                   I do it doggy style
                   2 Chainz
                   1 Ball
                   Or do I have one chain
                   And two balls?
                   Wait…
                   Let me recall
                   My dick game, it drive her wild
                   Opa, opa… Gangnam Style

Psy:            Ayyyyyyyyyy! Sexy lady.
                   Woof! Woof! Woof! Woof! Woof!
                   Opa Gangnam Style.
                   Ayyyyyyyyyy! Sexy lady.
                   Woof! Woof! Woof! Woof! Woof!
                   Opa Gangnam Style.

2 Chainz:    Binders full of bitches
                   Binders full of bitches
                   Binders full of bitches
                   I got binders full of bitches (Tru!)
                   Binders full of bitches
                   Binders full of bitches
                   Binders full of bitches
                   I got binders full of bitches (Tru!)

                   2 Chaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinz!

Psy:            Opa Gangnam style!

 
Ghostwritten by Abdulnasir Imam a.k.a T.R.P. (Cause you know I already write half the shit on radio anyway, it’s why you listen. Speaking of which, yo Dre, where’s my money? Don’t let me sue you and put Detox on hold again! You see the work I put in on Kendrick Lamar’s album. Go ask Puffy who revived him.)

Sunday, September 30, 2012

THIRTY-ONE THINGS NIGERIANS ARE GOOD AT (HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY)


Written by Abdulnasir Imam, with contributions from Hajara Isa, Tosun Otituju, Muniat Attunise and a list of commentators, I wish not to mention, because I need to shine!

The ideas was to come up with 52 things Nigerians were good at for our 52nd independence anniversary, we got stuck at 31 because we hadn’t received this month’s budget and our editor Goodluck Jonathan (real name, no gimmick) wants to introduce next month’s own. Anyway enjoy our small progress:

1.MEDIOCRE ENTERTAINMENT
There’s no doubt the Nigerian entertainment industry has grown, but every worthy and critical success, there are a dozen more flash in the pans. Look no further than the music industry, for every D’banj, there are a hundred who copy and fail, at the very least have a hit that lasts three months and we never hear from them again. For every successful movie, there are 10 copycats to follow with the same storyline and probably the same actors typecast in the same role.

2. SPIRITUALITY
Nigerians are a very religious people, whether honestly or hypocritically. We take to calling God as serious business and sometimes we make it actual business. Sometimes we take God as one of the voters, so when there’s dispute over an election, we say, “That’s how God wanted it” and everybody shuts up.

3. SATIRE
Despite the fact that a majority of Nigerians don’t appreciate or at times understand satire, Nigeria has produced quite a number of satirist, especially in the literati. A fine example would be the Daily Times’ “How To” column by Elnathan John. From varying subjects as how to worship the Nigerian God to how to be a mechanic, John fills us with the reality of Nigeria through his cheeky humour.

4. SPORTS… NOT ALWAYS AND NOT LATELY
Gone are the glory days of U.S.A 94 and Atlanta 96 when we won the Olympic gold for football (we won our first two gold medals there, so much for 2012). Our most recent noteworthy achievement was getting D’Tigers (our basketball team) into their first Olympic ever and even though we crashed and burned, we still hail our players nonetheless.

5. NOLLYWOOD
Nobody makes a blockbuster quite like the Americans. Nobody makes a Bollywood movie quite like the Indians and in that same vein nobody makes a Nollywood movie quite like Nigerians (“The craziest magic in movies.” says Tosun Otituju). The sad part is the name Nollywood did not originate from Nigeria, as legend has it; it came from a Washington Post writer who coined the name after writing an article on the spread of African movies, specifically Nigerian movies in the United States among the Black community. I for one prefer to name it the Nigerian Movie Industry. Whatever the case, Nollywood has come to stay.

6. AFRO-BEAT
So Fela is no longer with us, but which nation do you know worships afro-beat music like us? Some of you may say that afro-beat died with Fela and that there are few afro-beat artists like Seun and Femi Kuti (heirs of the Fela kingdom), but I’d like to believe afro-beat has morphed into what we hear in the radio these days. Be it afro-pop or afro-hip-hop, the influence of afro-beat is never far away from our music… even the mediocre ones.

7. RHYTHM
Galala, saw, makossa, yahozee, ethegi, azonto. Nigerians know how to do all types of steps and if we’re not borrowing we’re inventing one every season. Oya dance for me baby, oh yeah!

8. ARTISTIC
Sure, we can be mediocre at times, but there’s no denying the amount of talent Nigeria has.

9. LITERATURE
Speaking of being artistic, there’s no doubt Nigeria has produced a great number of literature giants on the world with more being born everyday. Here’s a short, but portent list:
·        Chinua Achebe
·        Wole Soyinka
·        Cyprian Ekwensi
·        Chimamanda Adichie
·        Helon Habila

“The Nigerian people have taken to Literature, quite well. We are at period of literal renaissance and a new crop of young literal enthusiast is distinguishing themselves nationally and internationally.”- Hajara Isa

10. NON-NIGERIA AFRICA BASHING
We are very good at bashing any African country that is not Nigeria; just ask one of our particular West African neighbours. We love our neighbours generally and despite our house not being in order, the Nigerian is always superior. We are still in denial that another neighbour of ours will soon be supplying us what electricity. What are you saying? We are Nigerians, we’re better!

11.WE ARE LOUD
NIGERIANS ARE LOUD! IF YOU EVER SEE A GROUP OF BLACK PEOPLE AT THE AIRPORT SPEAKING ABOVE THE NORMAL DECIBEL, NA OUR PEOPLE! NA US THEY SEND BACK FROM SAUDI ARABIA*.

*That’s not why they really sent us back.

12. POLITICAL ACTIVISM
Nigerians are political animals by nature, whether fighting for a righteous cause or a sectional one. Nigerians get active with politics, which leads us to next contrary item on the list:

13. OFTEN TALK ABOUT PROTESTING, BUT NEVER PROTEST
Yes, Nigerians protest. As a matter of fact the last great almost-revolt was the #OccupyNigeria movement, which took place in January of this year and saw practically all walks of life flood the streets, except for those who could afford fuel. But generally Nigerians only talk more about protesting than actually doing it and when it’s done, it’s almost silly and uncovered by the media or portrayed as insignificant, except when we almost grounded the country to a halt. #Occupy

14. LIVE IN A FEDERAL COUNTRY, BUT AREN’T FEDERAL
Nigerians like to shout, “One Nigeria” whenever there is a rally, but the man from Kaduna who grew up in Cross Rivers can never run for governor without some harsh opposition about where he’s from. Ask the “settlers” in Jos, they’ll help sympathize with this dilemma.

15. TRIBAL WAR
There’s a great song by Nas and Damian Marley featuring K’Naan called, ‘Deadly Equation (Tribal War)’. K’Nann’s verse explains how tribal wars actually work. Basically at the end everybody gets wiped out until brothers are left and they kill each other. Fortunately for us, our population never goes down so we haven’t reached that stage.

16. “RELIGIOUS” WARRING
By now I think we’ve all realized that most crusades ignited by religion in Nigeria ultimately have very little to do with the religions involved and more to do with something else… idle hands.

17. POLITICAL AMNESIA
There’s an Islamic saying, “People get the leaders they deserve.” In our case, it may be because we suffer from political amnesia, we so easily forget the political mishaps of the past and vote the same people in or rather allow them to be counted on the ballot, thus political amnesia.

18. BRAIN DRAIN
Nigeria has without a doubt given away some of its best brains to foreign countries and as much as we hail them and claim them ours, we know the reality is they are no longer part of the Nigerian dream as we would like to think they are. Not many people come home after building a successful life abroad, unless they have to, in which case we claim they were not successful in the first place.

19. SELF DENIAL
Most recently, American hip-hop sensation Rick Ross shot a video for his Hold Me Back single in Nigeria. It was an alternative version to the one already being shown on various music stations. Like the one shot in his native U.S.A, the new video pretty much showed the gritty and grime life of the down-trodden and mostly poor. Trust our government to ban the video, it’s not like Rick Ross hired actors to portray poor Nigerians. Those WERE poor Nigerians that were already there. I guess the powers that be prefer champagne popping videos shot in South Africa because that really does portray the real Nigeria. Well let this be known that this list IS a real portrayal of Nigeria and these haters can’t hold me back, these haters can’t hold me back!

20. POPULATION
Technically, this isn’t something you can be said to be good at, but sometimes we have nothing to brag about so we mention that there are 160 MILLION of us. We’re the 7th largest population in the world. Behind China, India, America, Indonesia, Brazil and Pakistan can talk to us, everybody in Africa keep quiet. If you have a problem with that, I have 159.999999999 million brothers and sisters to back me up! WHAT?! Say something! I dare you!

21. GOVERMENTAL SABOTAGE
We are not talking about coup-d’états here, we are talking about government deals especially with foreign companies. We’ve all heard the stories (Richard Branson had one lately), a company comes to Nigeria to invest and naturally they meet the government or rather someone who works for the government and are told they have to spare some cash first before business can be done! Before you know it business is either done after a lot of cash has been spared (and not the one for the business) or the company leaves and settles in Ghana.

22. DELEGATING
Nigerians are very good at delegating what they should be doing themselves. As Muniat Attunise puts it, Nigerians are great at delegating the hard work for God while wanting to reap the rewards.”

23. SETTING UP COMMITTEES
This is self explanatory, Nigerians set up committees to review committees that were set up to review a committee that couldn’t handle an issue. I’m sure they’ll set up a committee to review who wrote this and another to decide what to do with it.

24. MURDERING THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE
Abi you no know? You would think that a nation colonized by the British would at least have a better grasp of the English language than most, but not necessarily. When the Colonials came, our chiefs were willing to sell their brethrens for mirrors, alcohol and gunpowder (that did not come with the gun), but there was no way in hell we were going to speak English just like that. We invented the remix, way before Puff Daddy or P. Diddy or whatever he’s remixed his name to now. It started with us turning the English language into Pidgin English to the point that when we do speak the Queen’s English, we still murder it. Are you hearing me, because I am hearing you?!

25. WE ARE WARM PEOPLE
Despite sometimes being a proud and at times arrogant people, Nigerians are generally warm people. We are perhaps more welcoming to visitors than we are to each other.

26. WE ARE TRENDY
“Nigerians are top buyers, we patronize the best of technology; phones, cars, the latest gadget or fad.”- Hajara Isa

27. NIGERIANS ARE WELL TRAVELLED
For those who can afford and even those who just make it to Cotonou and back, Nigerians do travel a lot.

28. NIGERIANS ARE ENTREPRENURIAL &RESOURCEFUL
Look around, everybody get e handwork o! Nigerians are quite resourceful with their time, even certain illegalities have been made into business ventures, you know now. Before I let you go, let me inform you that you can reach me at Chinedu & Sons, Wuse Market Shop 999 or you can contact us at 080555555555.

29. NIGERIANS ARE A HAPPY PEOPLE
As Fela said, “Suffering and smiling!”

30. NIGERIANS ARE MALLEABLE
I admit I had to check the dictionary for the meaning of this word. In essence Nigerians are adoptable people, which is true. Everywhere you go there’s a Nigerian… unless perhaps money can not be made there.

31. ENDURING SPIRIT
We saved the best for last. Perhaps the greatest Nigerian characteristic is our undying spirit. Nigerians have been through a lot; military regimes, planes falling on our houses, you name it we’ve seen it. The only exception is God has spared us from natural disasters, you see the man-made ones are enough for us. Through it all Nigerians have decided to keep hope. Here’s to hope we see another independence day. God bless you and God bless Nigeria!